Tuesday, October 02, 2007

grizzly bears . . .

. . . that is what is on the state flag of California. I miss it actually. Thinking about it a lot today. There was a smell that reminded me of this potpourri that I used to have when I was a little girl. I don't know how I got it or why, but the smell is rather like faded roses and crisp branches. Then driving to class today it softly rained in this field that has a lot of bitter weeds in it - you know the type that bleed milky white when crushed. The smell was amazing.

Ah, California. What a tempestuous relationship we have. I should work on going out there this summer. Doing some reading, writing. Hanging out on the boardwalk in Santa Monica. Visit a Borders. Have some real Mexican food. Figure out if that is where I want to go after graduation. We'll see.

What is that great line from Cannery Row? Something about the stink of nostalgia. . .

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wow Steinbeck took me back to Andy's class! What do you think became of her??? Here's the quote by the way, had to look it up cause I knew what you were talking about.
On California
"a poem, a stink, a grating noise, a quality of light, a tone, a habit, a nostalgia, a dream."

I do miss that bear and our state, California gets into your blood and regardless of how far you travel it always crys home, that being said I think you can only appreciate California when you leave it. I go back from time to time, sadly the more I go back the more I realise I'm no longer a Californian. I'd not had a Tommie Burger in years I had to go have, I was salivating on my way to the burger joint. Harry and I got lost eventually after a few wrong turns and a call to Holly we got to the place ordered out food, it was no longer the same, didn't taste as good as it once did. This last trip I found so many things no longer smelled the same, taste the same or hell even felt the same. I couldn't help but feel painfully sad, Cali will always be in me I think I say, more and more that I'll return cause somehow if I stop daying that I fear a part of me will die. The world is vast and beautiful I'm getting to know as much of it as I can, but my heart will always belong to our sunshine state. Cheers to California the good and the bad.